the entry about douchebag-ism much

we all like to think that we are better than the next person; nary one would ever think of himself as a, for the lack of a better word, shithead. but admit it, from time to time, we mess up and end up being the epitome of a sorry loser. what are the tell-tale signs of being a douchebag you say? well, read on.

1. whilst some things could go hand in hand, texting and conversations just do not. it's hard to have a decent conversation when half the time you're looking down at your mobile and rapidly thumbing away. whilst you're trying to impress the other party that you're capable of multi-tasking, the implicit fact to them is, you're just a douchebag. (i'm guilty of that too.) douche-meter: 2 out of 5

2. movie talkers are a classic breed of what i would call, platinum douchebags. they express their thoughts out loud or revel in revealing the plot-lines, or explain the storyline of the movie to their fellow movie-mates. here's some examples: "ok, here's where julia's going to take the knife and stab him from behind.", or when watching a comedy, *points* "haha! that's so funny!" douche-meter: 3 out of 5

3. while some looks are a precarious fence-sitter between fashion fineness and fashion flop,

over-the-top embellished prints on shirt and trucker caps courtesy of ed hardy are clearly way off the spectrum when it comes to fashion faux pas. if you're caught like a deer in headlights donning these sequined, campy graphic gear and think you're cool, you're in line to be the next giant cosmic douchebag. douche-meter: 3 out of 5

4. somewhere between fluffy light-heartedness and extreme hedonism, there's an entire caste of people who, for a better reason or not, choose to use animal/cartoon/scenic pictures in place of their profile pictures on social networking sites. whilst you might be clueing to others you're as cute as elmo or like a summer breeze in spring, a profile picture is called a profile picture for a good reason. spare us the agony of metaphorical decipherment of your level of douche-ism. douche-meter: 2 out of 5

5. oh-so-haughty elitists ought to be shot in the gonads. period. they think everyone is beneath them when in fact, they really need to be looking hard at themselves. if you subscribe to such ideology, congratulations, you have the hallmarks of being a major douchebag. douche-meter: 5 out of 5.

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the entry shanghai-ed my glutes

it was criminally lax of me to allow my fitness activity to glide at a glacial pace. i've mentioned before in my resolution to frequent the gym conscientiously. my attempt is more than deplorable. the only pizazz i've added to my list of noteworthy achievements of late is to slump over in bed, scroll down facebook, and listen to miley warbling about being almost able to see the dream that she's been dreaming (hint: vertical ascent), whilst knocking down enemies in final fantasy xiii. someone award me a trophy for multi-tasking already.

confound me, but have i lately broached the exercise phenomenon known as vibrate-till-your-ass-muscles-buckle? the nomenclature of this form of exercise, a.k.a power plates, is the latest craze which has taken over hollywood by storm led by the honchos of celebs like madonna and clint eastwood. power plates uses the principle of acceleration training to simulate the body's natural response to vibration. a 25-minute workout is equivalent to two to three hours in the gym!

cookiedough needs to feel his abs.

four more abs to go to an adonis body.

the solution to it all: power plates!

me with paul in tow.

the folks at croyez studio (pronounced as 'krwah-yay'), which is located at dempsey road, invited me and my intrepid crony paul to give a shot at being a powerplater. verdict: fifteen minutes into the exercise and i was sweating crazy my underarm deodorant smelled like fresh pine that was one day too old. not pleasant at all. my forecast for next few days is intense muscle aches with high possibility of torrential cramps.

a myriad of power plate regimes to cater to different individuals.

jane, our sprightly coach, feigning niceness. devil incarnate!

power plates proves to be not as easy as it looks.

a big thank-you to gwendolyn, the owner of croyez.

am i going back for more of this? you betcha. i just need to invest in more potent sweatsticks. to find out more about this revolutionary exercise, call 6474 4133/6474 4140 or visit their website at www.croyez.com.sg.

in other news, my office is piling with trash. evidently, there isn't a system for taking out the dump. our office has three waste bins and no one clears it fastidiously enough that fruit-flies have been growing amongst them. this morning i went digging through the pile and fished out a wrapped sandwich that went bad almost a week ago. i am going to go all pep-talky on these spudhead staff real soon.

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the entry of gleeful quotes

by now, i'm sure everyone has caught onto the bandwagon of the whirlwind hit tv series that is glee. it's a culmination of high school musical-meets-mean girls with a tight script that's fun, funny and has heart. already, i've developed an irrepressible foible for the characters like self-idolizing sue sylvester, or emma pilsbury, whose case of ocd is a tad, well, obsessive. the series' gotten to me so much, everytime i hear i kissed a girl on the airwaves, i have half a mind to slap my thigh like how stutter-y tina does it in the series.

so here's a tribute with my top ten quotes from the show:

10. "your resentment is delicious". - sue

9. "anything less than a four-hundred thread count and i could break out into impetigo!" - sandy

8. "eavesdrop much?" - quinn

7. "i swear to you i will stick my fist so far down your throat you'll taste my armpit hairs!" - ken

6. "my body is like a rum chocolate souffle: if i don't warm it up right, it doesn't rise." - kurt

5. "we just sold all seventeen copies of your cd!" "i didn't even have to show any of them my bosoms!" - will's folks

4. "take what away?" - brittany, who else?

3. "who is josh groban? kill yourself!" - sandy

2. "i'll often yell at homeless people, 'hey, how's that homelessness working out for you? give not being homeless a try, huh?' " - sue

1. "have you ever liked somebody so much you just wanna lock yourself up in your room, turn on sad music and cry?" - rachel "no." - emma (segues into car scene of emma alone, crying and hysterically singing along to the stereo "all by myself")

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the entry written at 2:30

it seems that the entire planet has been conspiring a hush-hush ruse to divert my attention from blogging, my favorite pastime after excessive cam-whoring and shopping. i have joined the likes of many others in the dizzying chase to fashion a lavish, sophisticated restaurant in the online game restaurant city, had too many drinking binges, one too many meetings with directors from my current company and the potentially new one (apparently there's a counteroffer of sorts from both employments) and way too much time preoccupied with my new iphone.

a look at my recent addiction.

the main thing i've managed to accomplish in the past two weeks is attending the five-day core curriculum course by the new company and having an insight into their products and culture. of course it involved waking up in the wee hours of the day to the tune of feral cats mewing along with the cacophony of the canine barks. man, do i loathe getting up so early! i had to force my reluctant body up and swaddle myself in office garb. the lessons started at 9:00 in the morning, and by 1:00pm, everyone was gasping and giddy with the influx of information being chugged down our throats.

my temporary pass for gaining access into the prudential's labryinth

on the train rides home (yes, i took the commuters' favorite mode of transport during such times), as all the lethargy washed away and my self-consciousness slowly but surely resumed, i found myself positively simmering with fever. thank god there's always restaurant city to quell that off within the confines of my hovel.

this is a relatively short entry.

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the entry about pulling the brakes on partying ... not!

it's been a while,

i know i shouldn't have kept you waiting...

but i'm here now!

anyhoos, this is another default posting about clubbing and having a good time plastering myself. in case you were wondering if i had a wardrobe change within the same night, well, i ain't exactly dotty enough to do that. so it's been a weekend of endless nights rocking on with the music, and then on the other hand, i am lamenting about my insomniac problems. convoluted much?

if you need a refreshing hairstyle, look up ark lin @ pacific plaza

chong chia, who knows a thing or two about 炒氣氛

the suddenly pensive chong 

kelly thien, who commands a huge presence in the modelling world. big fan!

duncan and i whispering sweet nothings.

on a side-note, i've received numerous postings and messages about us looking alike. as hard as i try squinting at our photos, i see little similarity. but then again, it's a compliment, looking like the ever-cute duncan.

so that's day one. the following day happens to be my buddy paul lim's birthday celebration (happy birthday once again!). we chilled out at party world, engaged in a little drinking session, sang into mikes suffused with previous users' slobber, and cut some nice cake from spinelli's. 

kenneth, paul and i at my place before our warbling session

i was intensely involved in the song i didn't know i was being snapped at.

x-tin popped by the club and we indulged in a little tongue frolicking. nah, it's only 借位.

this is crazy, but i actually sat in the middle of the road. 

thankfully i survived to write this posting.

okay, this might sound a little juvenile, but i totally psyched up about the impending sequel to transformers! i hope it's gonna be bigger and better!

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the entry about filling in the blanks and getting retro

if it's anything, it's been an extremely busy day that i was almost short of dying from breathlessness. but i only have my own idiocy to admonish for addressing less pressing issues together with the more pivotal ones. the house was on fire and yet, i was worried about the kitchen sink. nonetheless, other than verging on asphyxiation, it has indeed been a rewarding day.

they say the eyes are the windows to a person's soul, but to me, a winsome smile is the way to prevail upon a person's heart. being called gap toothed or madonna-esque isn't exactly complimentary, though some might disagree. "keep it", some of my friends remarked, "that's the unique thing about you". i beg to differ. if you guys hadn't noticed thus far, here's how bad my gap-tooth predicament is:

my unsightly, huge niche for morsel reservations

after much contemplation and sourcing around for cut-rate, quality dental service, i finally decided upon valley point dental clinic @ valley point to fill in the blanks, literally. the dentist in charge was doctor ashim dutt, and he explained the procedure carefully, which was termed composite bonding. basically, the approach was to smoothen out the edges and fill the cavity with a tough, synthetic resin. the resin is impregnated with inorganic fillers and matches the shade and color of the teeth. the entire procedure was a laborious hour effort but thankfully, he was extremely meticulous to ensure that the end result was exactly what i had expected. if any of you guys need cosmetic dental surgeries, do look him up. seriously.

doctor dutt (pronounced as "dud"), the dude

the ever congenial nurse mas

using a dental saw to smoothen the edges before using the fillers

cramming more dental equipment into my almost gagging mouth.

carrying on...

on 12th dec 2008, i committed the cardinal sin of utmost tackiness. andy lau was in town for his asia leg tour and being offered free tickets, i decided to give it a shot with acute circumspect. i guess going to an event with no/low expectations has its fair share of benefits after all. the singing veteran turned out a good performance instead.

thumbs up to andy for making a concert with most of the songs unfamiliar to me a very intimate and entertaining affair. the entire set was tight and elaborate with a lot of emphasis placed on choreography and stages props. this, coming from someone who didn't have a dancing background (according to my friend barbara), completely bowled me over. of course, the cursed fans shouting through the roof certainly helped wrecked my hearing.

choc-a-bloc fillings and cyalume galore

a little s&m action: andy lifted up with quaint robes.

a music video of andy in his heydays.

confetti factory meets chang-e's

an enthusiastic fan with light sticks in tow

countdown to encore

the two extremely adorable mascots that turned up

during the encore, coupled with helium voices

so much fun that andy decided to join in the bandwagon

after the much better than anticipated concert, i made a mad dash for the exit to the next venue for a friend's birthday party. happy early thirties birthday, willie! thanks for the great time and the alcohol. the following is a tribute to you.

guess who's the birthday boy and who's the playboy?

now you know the who's who.

tongue-and-cheek: the ever effervescent, ethereal x-tin

liking truffles much? look up julius the truffles maestro

the new macdonald's spokesperson: mr. pierre goh

more party folks.

the man who can't be seen

mr. incognito and i peering into some zany crystal ball.

a little more cam-whoring.

nights out. see you guys at zoukout 2008, part-ee on!!

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