the entry written at 2:30

it seems that the entire planet has been conspiring a hush-hush ruse to divert my attention from blogging, my favorite pastime after excessive cam-whoring and shopping. i have joined the likes of many others in the dizzying chase to fashion a lavish, sophisticated restaurant in the online game restaurant city, had too many drinking binges, one too many meetings with directors from my current company and the potentially new one (apparently there's a counteroffer of sorts from both employments) and way too much time preoccupied with my new iphone.

a look at my recent addiction.

the main thing i've managed to accomplish in the past two weeks is attending the five-day core curriculum course by the new company and having an insight into their products and culture. of course it involved waking up in the wee hours of the day to the tune of feral cats mewing along with the cacophony of the canine barks. man, do i loathe getting up so early! i had to force my reluctant body up and swaddle myself in office garb. the lessons started at 9:00 in the morning, and by 1:00pm, everyone was gasping and giddy with the influx of information being chugged down our throats.

my temporary pass for gaining access into the prudential's labryinth

on the train rides home (yes, i took the commuters' favorite mode of transport during such times), as all the lethargy washed away and my self-consciousness slowly but surely resumed, i found myself positively simmering with fever. thank god there's always restaurant city to quell that off within the confines of my hovel.

this is a relatively short entry.

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the entry about notwithstanding premises and bereavement

i'd like to think of myself as not a stupid person, or at least that's what i think. but i couldn't help feeling like a nincompoop after watching the dvd version of push, starring chris evans and dakota fanning. if push came to shove, i would have stayed away from that flick even if my life depended on it. unless you're planning to ingest a 111 minute mind-numbing picture permeated with perfunctory acting, plagiaristic plots, and cringe-worthy jargons (the characters are categorized under pushers, watchers, movers, bleeders, stitchers, etc), my advise would be you're better off just watching recaps of michael jackson's videos.

speaking of the late superstar, the news of his demise came as a huge shock to me. i was under the impression that this might have been one of the many internet hoaxes that we see these days, but alas, it was not meant to be. his premature death also drives home a poignant yet oft-shunned truism of life. for all the money he had in the world, the white-gloved entertainer proved to us that even the most sizzling, brightest star has a use-by date. we are reminded of our mortality and it exposes the frailty and vulnerability in all of us, that wherever we are born, however wealthy or healthy we might be, whatever kind of looks we are endowed with, our span on this planet is limited, is finite. we live, we age, and for better or for worse, we die. every thread of relationship we ever had, every wisp of memory we ever held, every facet of feelings we ever felt, it'd be all wiped out in the blink of an eye that never opens again. we fall into a chasm of darkness that we will never be able to climb out of, ever. in the most literal sense, it's the eternal slumber that no one, in his right frame of mind, would ever look forward to.

poetically speaking, death is a fact of life. the best we can make of life is to cherish it whilst it lasts. seize the day and live the moment, for life is short.

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the entry about my new phone

blimey! forgive me for sounding neurotic, but standing in line under the wretched humid weather for an undivided six hours has really taken a toll on yours truly. let me get down to the story proper. so you guys know that the much-hyped iphone 3gs has made its way to singapore shores. being the veritable avid fan of all things pome-like, i decided that "the early bird catches the worm" prophecy has a certain level of verity. i arrived at the venue half-hour early, and much to my aghast, as much as the others who were joining on the bandwagon, the snaking crowd has definitely triumphed any others i have ever come across. think hello-kitty heydays, and you'd get the idea. being there and square, and practically nothing else to do on my hands, i decidedly joined the intrepid hundreds others to be the first to brandish the new phone.

but six wacko hours, i am telling you. i was so freaking miffed. and when i get miffed, it's not pretty. it's definitely not pretty at all. i need my anger management sponsor right now! but anyways, i digress. yet again.

anyways, three hundred and sixty god-damned minutes. with that abundance of time, i could have accomplished lots. i could have made my way to the gym, hopped over for a tanning session, sat down with my cronies for a drink, and even make time to meet up with a client to discuss some work. nah, but who am i kidding? i would just be at home wilting away languishingly.

but finally, i've got it. so goodbye, my distasteful laggy prada phone. i am sticking to iphone, that's an affirmation. here's some pics:

adieu lg prada and your quaint technology!

customized my iphone to a striking blue and yellow. nice much?

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the entry about flying high

hi folks, i am suddenly having a reminiscent flashback to the days when i was a klutzy flight attendant and it's a shocking revelation how fleeting time is, besides the crinkling crow's feet and laughing lines that is slowly but surely surfacing. it's been a darn three years since i've left the trade of sloshing coffee or tea to perversely demanding passengers.

nevertheless, there's always the enjoyment of the camaraderie and shenanigans with my fellow colleagues, my group of coterie who perk up the otherwise oft lulling flights. so here's a trip down memory lane of living the high life in an air-dry cabin 30,000 feet up in the skies and bitching about the cattle-class passengers who expect more than what they actually pay for.

on a sidetrack, i would just like to dispel the frequent myths. myth number one: the ubiquitous mile-high club that every cabin crew encounters. fact: non-existent, as much as i know for that matter of fact. myth number two: working onboard is a breeze. fact: major misconception. be prepared to work your wedgies off. the only breeze one encounters is when you're sailing through the aisles with adept briskness to deliver the darned papers or serve a row of passengers a drink one passenger after the other.

anyways, the following are the pictures in my life as a high-class waiter with singapore airlines. don't fall off your seats; i used to be the epitome of dorkiness in my heydays.

my virgin experience donning the cabin crew uniform

training days with my fellow batch mates

slipping on the chief flight attendant uniform for kicks.

suits me much though, i think personally.

my usual slacking habits. i guess singapore airlines nurtured me this way.

the first plane i am trained to wreck all the passengers' experience onboard.

a final picture before we graduate. teary affair.

start of my inaugural flight with some of the crew. taken in tokyo.

fancy freezing your ass off? go to athens during winter.

gal-pal wah. still very good friends after all these while.

they say size does matter. i couldn't agree more.

a get together with my batch-mates after a five year hiatus.

meanwhile, the korean girl fluff "nobody nobody" is recurring in my head. i need therapy!

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the entry about designer bags and walk of life

know this, investor-wannabes: take the wise road and park your money on french-originated, vintage label louis vuitton than place your bets on speculative rollercoaster-riding shares. the damned top of the line minaudiere boutique still sees trickling crowds lined along the velvet ropes outside of the shop's premises. i foresee a congenial, upward growth in the intrinsic value of zee bags.

bring out the bargain tables!!

moving on, in light of what has transcended over the past few weeks, i could only admonish myself for being languid in my work and overzealously partaking in societal matters which contributed to nothing short of a deficit in my bank account. speaking of career paths, the moral police in me still hovers: should i linger on in a company which promises nothing but a cul-de-sac in my vocation, though retaining my clients, or move on to a promising head honcho which could potentially bring my career to greater heights, thus risking losing my existing clientele?

am still thinking of my next step whilst munching on a timeout bar. sounds riveting already...

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the entry about something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue

all ye commitment-phobes and marriage-eschewers, be on the qui vive. if in any case you belong to this bracket(s), it's better to skedaddle off this entry. otherwise, fashion yourself under the mistletoe, for t'is the season to tie the knot.

it couldn't be farther from the truth in the case of my beloved cousin, jin, who becomes husband and wife in legal ceremony with her beau of 12 years. 12 years. 12 freaking years... that's longer than all the relationships combined i've endured in my entire life. now that's what i call fidelity.

let me digress a little first with some pictures of my nephew declan with the virtuosity of a winsome disposition, in preps for the wedding. obviously, bow-ties and pjs don't go hand in hand; it's just a dress rehearsal.

someone's got the morning grumps

finally letting up a little

now, on to the espousal proper. in the line of traditional chinese marriages, there's the usual brouhaha about collecting an auspicious red packet from the groom by the bridesmaid before being let into the bride's house, tea ceremony for the elders, and, well ... you know the routine. here's a pic of the bride, my cousin, doing her cheesy pose for the cam.

butterflies in the stomach? fret not. just wear a veil.

from left to right: mom, cousin jin, major celeb (yours truly), and groom isaac

the twin effect? not exactly. my elder but more handsome brother.

me twenty years down the road: my old man and i.

the evening soiree was held at sentosa cove's one degree fifteen. after a change of attire, fifteen glasses of chardonnay, and tons of handshakes with random inconsequential guests, i was beginning to warm up to the initially blasé event. anyone with a good liquor threshold should have joined me in my alcohol romp.

words of blessings written on the stones for the newlyweds.

cousin jin in her ravishing cheongsam, and me in my pseudo-tux outfit.

bow-tie meets bow-tie

chic sis-in-law, me, and my brother. judging from who's holding onto the handbag, it's a telling sign who wears the pants in the household. just kidding.. not!

a candid pic of declan with his bedroom eyes, looking all sorts of hilarious.

jin thinking: get on with the speech already...

anyone recalls the mocca advertisement? remember the muscled guy who beckons you to check out his pipes whilst flexing his bulging biceps? look below, it's mr. mocca!

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the entry marches on

reservist has loomed on me; doomsday. every other day for four straight weeks, i am sent to the cursed parade square at safti military instituate, marching on for endless hours under the sweltering sun, with "dig in", "watch your front"-esque commands constantly barked at us by the paunchy regiment sergeant major wielding his willowy peystick (the juxtaposition of it all).

it's all in a day's work (well, 15 to be exact, including the rehearsals i have to sit through) for the saf day parade, a "highlight in the military calendar and serves as a reminder of the importance of national defence". bah, i say. bs! highlight this though: the numerous fainting spells spotted in the regiment wings. soldiers were falling out of the parade rehearsals, both young and curmudgeonly, dropping like flies due to the immense heat, no thanks to the afternoon sun. the fool that i am, refused to and soldiered on, through gritting teeth, and thus endured a 12-hour march that starts from 7 every morn'. hopefully i won't pass out due to over-exhaustion or some of my neighbouring comrade's feta-smelling body odour. hence, this is a plea from those who, like me, have perfectly functioning olfactory systems, to those who exacerbates the pungent air situation: shove a sweat stick under those pits!

when this entire pervy ordeal has been squared away, i vow never to don on the uniform ever. all i need now is a jolly-good excuse that could extricate me from the yearly callbacks. think, des, think!

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the entry after midnight

due to the lack of sleeping pills, i am back vegetating in front of my apple monitor with eyes wide open. i guess i will just have to rely on the wonders of staying awake in the wee hours of the morning till day breaks and a complete wave of lethargy overwhelms me before i could hit the sack. i always believed it to be a psychological thing and i could always cajole myself into slumber-land by whipping up "happy thoughts, nice things" in my head or counting sheep. or making myself a mug of frothy warm milk. or reading a book till my eyes glaze over because of the minute font size. or anything else. none of these prescribed methods work. i still need my pills!!

on a brighter note, i am starting to get back into the throes of work. witnessing how my bank account has shriveled to a measly four-figure sum is an apparent sign that i have been neglecting bringing in the dough. i am hoping my hard work will garner me some much needed cash to tide over this cash-strapped period. someone, anyone, break me a leg.

this is just random, but the word shriveled just reminded me of my junior college days. then, we had this ghastly teacher who taught us english and she was the epitome of what a loathsome creature a person could be. anyhoos, my friend and i were thinking of a word or two to succinctly describe her. both of us conjured up "shriveled prune" at the same time, spot on. it would be mere coincidence to say one single word together but to actually mouth two different words at the same time, well, let's just say that great minds think alike.

i bought this acrylic tumbler remake of a plastic disposable on a whim and little did i know that there was a boon that came along with the price tag. apparently, everytime you use the tumbler for your next order of espresso/machiatto/latte/americano/(the list could go on, but you get my drift) at starbucks, you get a fifty-cent rebate. i was tantalized and gratified. ain't shopping just great with the perks?!

save the earth & save some moolah at the same time

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the entry about another unhitching post

oh how have we advanced in terms of theatrical technology. first there was thx, then we moved onto dolby stereo, and now we herald the quantum leap into digital 3d. conversely, megan fox (hot female lead in transformers and the upcoming transformers 2: revenge of the fallen) has degenerated and ditched her squeaky-clean image and opted for a midriff-baring, tattered denim shorts et al nympho in her latest movie outing. nevertheless, she's smoking!!!

my grey matter is disintegrating by the minute. i am practically talking about humdrum matters in life that don't even matter to me at all.

on another note, i managed to catch sam raimi's drag me to hell. if you are prepared for a edge-of-the seat, nail-biting experience, do watch out for this premise. it's a campy hell of a scary ride that will have you jumping from your seat for one minute, and giggling at the over-the-top gore the next ,which sam is a maestro at. i enjoyed it so much i ended up bunking with my maid just to quell over the horror that still inhibited me very much so after watching it. so much for machismo.

god forgive me.

meanwhile, being a technophile, whom are basically a breed of decidedly whimsical people when it comes to gadgetry, i am beginning to scour the market for the latest handphone, given that the previous phone i had just procured, lg prada ii, just two months ago has failed to live up to its expectations of a pricey tag and has the technological speed of a 286 processor. i am looking forward to the new release of iphone 3rd generation, which spots a gamut of different colors, or the blackberry thunder touchscreen. i am torn between these two. any advice anyone?

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the entry about eating back my own words

i know i am capricious and all, and i did mention about it being redundant and verbose a couple entries ago, but, the question of the day is: "have you twittered yet?"

follow me at http://www.twitter.com/iruffkookydough already. 'nuff said.

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